As many of you know we welcomed our fourth child (second daughter) Hannah Elizabeth into this world on September 28th of 2011. Which was a Wednesday night. She was not due until October 14th. Although she almost three weeks early she was one beautiful and healthy baby girl. She weighed 7 lbs 15 oz and was 20.5 inches long. They decided to go ahead with the c-section early because of my contractions. I went in for monitoring because of the blood pressure and contractions. The contractions kept getting stronger and stronger so the Dr. decided it was time to go...and go we did. I was so nervous because I was not 'ready' for her to come. You see...Joel I went into labor with when it was 'his' time. I ended up with a long labor and then ended up a c-section. Abbey and Micah were both planned c-sections so I knew when I had to have everything ready. Hannah was scheduled for an October 12th delivery. I didn't have everything done! I had a feeling she would be early. I hoped she would come early. She came early! The surgery went well with a few minor complications but baby Hannah was perfect. I was taken to the recovery room and for the first time was able to hold our beautiful gift from God. I have never been able to hold any of our babies in the recovery room because of complications so this was an amazing feeling. I felt so good! We had our normal hospital stay. I was doing good. Hannah was doing great. We were ready to go home. I was scheduled to leave Sunday morning, until I got sick. They took out my normal IV out on Friday. I felt fine. On Sat I spiked a very high fever and they knew I had some kind of infection but could not figure out where. They decided to run a blood culture to see if they could figure out where the infection was. The bad part was that it was going to take three days to get the results back. At this point I was very sick and they had such a hard time getting blood let alone putting an IV back in and started me on an antibiotic. I kept spiking my fever. They thought it was my incision but it was looking good. They put me on two very strong antibiotics and alternated between the two every two hours.They tried to take me off of IV antibiotics but that did not work my fever kept returning. On Monday I was very ill. Josh was standing right next to me and I reached for his and and told him I could not breathe. I could take very short little breaths but could not do more than that. Nurses and Dr.'s came running. They rushed me to x-ray to see if I had a blood clot. However, I am allergic to iodine and they could not do what they wanted to. They ended up taking a normal x-ray and then ended up taking ultra sounds of my legs to see if they could find any. None were found. I was breathing fine again and God's good hands had healed me.
In the mean while Hannah was doing wonderful and the nursery ladies just loved her and Josh got a lot of one on one with her Daddy (she is now a Daddy's girl). Josh was so amazing throughout my stay and was there with me the entire time. He took such great care of us. I could not nurse her because of my fevers. She was very weak as well because of her being early. She had a hard time eating. She was suppose to be discharged Sunday night with out me. They said she could stay at the hospital with me but I had to have somebody stay with her at all times. The nurses and Hannah's pediatrician was wonderful. They new I was still sick and so they were able to keep her because of her jaundice one more day which allowed for one more day without worrying what we would do. Knowing that they were going to discharge Hannah and not me. Josh's grandma was so great and was able to come over on Monday and stay at the hospital with me the rest of my stay since Josh had to get back to work. Josh's amazing mother took the older kids the week before because of my complications. I was not too happy about it at first because I wanted them with me. However God knew what I needed. I am so glad that Carol had the kids. It allowed me be in the hospital and not worry about them. I knew they were doing great with her. The did not have to see me so sick and I did not have to worry about getting home and taking care of them.
They got my fevers under control but my body was still fighting. I started to get severe hot flashes where I felt like I was burning up for hours. Then I would get severe cold spells well I felt like I lived in the arctic and no matter how many warm blankets they put on my I could not get warm and I just shivered. At one point I had five warm blankets on and was still freezing. The Dr. could not do anything for these temperature problems. I could not leave until I was fever free for 24 hours. Well Tuesday I did not have a fever. The Dr. came in on Wed morning and told me I was going home. I was freaking out. I was still having having these severe hot flashes and freezing. I could not go home. I didn't feel like I could take care of myself feeling so miserable. I knew God was healing my body and I knew he would take care of me. But I was scared to go home. What if I couldn't breath again? What if my fevers came back? I finally calmed down after lots of prayer and came to realize that I was going home with my baby girl. It was one long and scary week in the hospital but I survived. I was very ill but God healed me. He is so faithful!
We made it home Wednesday afternoon. It was so great being able to go outside again. Feeling the fresh air. It was such a beautiful day. God brought the sun out just for me. It was warm for several days after we got home. I was able to sit outside with Hannah. It allowed her to get some sun rays to help with her jaundice and allowed me to soak up the warmth. By the weekend my hot/cold flashes were pretty much gone and I was feeling so much better. Carol and Rick brought the kids home the next week and I was so glad to have my other kids home and for them to meet Hannah. They all fell in love with her! We are so blessed!
Why I am writing this post was to give you a small glimpse of this exciting and scary time for Josh and I. I prayed a lot. Josh prayed a lot. Family and friends were sending lots of prayers. A good friend of mine came in and prayed with us. God healed me in his time. It just took longer than I wanted. However I learned a great lesson while I was there. I was not living life like God wanted me to. I did not want him to take me. I had the perfect life. I loved my life and my family. I had a lot of conversation with God over these long days and nights. I knew when I walked out of the hospital then life was going to get better. Life has gotten better. God is even now a bigger part of my life. He keeps working with me. I am enjoying my kids more. I thought I was doing a good job with them. I realized that I was just getting by. I needed to be even more involved. We needed to center our days more around God and include Him more. I was called to homeschool and I needed to re-evaluate. I needed to be more involved. I have to teach them and guide them. How to keep a home. How to cook and to do laundry. I needed to be more involved. I was teaching them and guiding them but I was not doing it the way God wanted me to. I got that. It took a lot but I finally got it! Since Hannah's birth then I have had lots of talks with the Lord on this topic. I am trying to be more involved. I think we have a plan worked out. We have been able to settle a little with Hannah and have her figured out and on some sort of routine. The holidays and birthdays are over and I am now prepared and ready to move forward and take this on. I am excited to be the person God wants me to be. To be the mother and wife God wants me to be. I am not living for me I am living for God. I am not in charge God is. He is so amazing. I can't wait to see how this year is going to be for us! My kids will only be home a short while before they are old enough to start out on their own. It is my job to teach them everything I can while they are here. I am going to enjoy my time with them while I have them! I realized how precious life was. Live it with God and for Him. He is your guidance and counselor. He has your whole life planned out for you. He loves you!If you got through this long post...Thank you! I hope you have a great new year! I know we are!
With love,
Michelle
1 comment:
Wow Michelle! It sounds like you went through quite an ordeal! I'm so glad you were able to learn what God wanted of you. You are a wonderful mommy and I'm excited to see how God uses you in the lives of your little ones! <3
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